Rehabitus: Personal Growth in Life After Addiction
Word count: 730 // Read time: 2-3 minutes.
Who Are You?
If I asked you, ‘Who are you?’, you could answer however you desire.
You could define yourself in terms of your noble values and beliefs.
You might say,
‘I am resilient, compassionate, patient and evolving’.
Or you could delve into the abstract or philosophical:
‘I am a cluster of the universe, manifest into consciousness, on a journey of understanding itself’— if you want to feel a bit cosmic.
But as impressive as that may sound, I prefer two straightforward and practical answers. They resonate with me more than any grand existential poetry. They are simple and modest, and yet they are filled with unending potential:
‘I am the sum of all my choices.’
‘I am whatever I repeat.’
These truths are at the core of who we are. Choices make us, and they are our ultimate power. At any given time, a choice will point us in a direction. Choices can shape the light or the shadow of our lives.
The wisdom and the understanding of consequence behind your choices determine whether they lead to growth, healing, and freedom …or their opposites.
Choices explain how I became addicted to alcohol.
They are also at the heart of how I transformed my life—from decades of addiction into one of self-care, self-respect, and well-being.
And yet the choices that led me into addiction and those that led to sobriety are two sides of the same coin. My addiction and my sobriety are borne of the same place—a desire to address the fundamental needs that define my human nature.
The difference isn’t in my needs but in how I choose to meet them.
In addiction, I made unhealthy choices to numb the suffering from never understanding or meeting my needs. In sobriety, I make healthy and careful choices that aim for lasting, authentic solutions.
Becoming sober is an important choice. But sobriety doesn't open the gates of heaven to let you in. It opens the gates of hell to let you out.
This is where the real work begins. And there is always work to be done.
Choosing freedom from addiction grants you the power to make more thoughtful choices. But every day, you must direct your choices toward serving your well-being.
Sobriety is far beyond abstinence—it brings clarity to see the better paths that were once obscured and allows you to recognise the consequences that addiction had blurred.
Your choices determine how you meet your needs, and how you build your life. You may still build your house on sand where it may crumble beneath you, or on rock where it stands firm in the face of life’s storms. The foundation you choose will shape everything. Your character is that foundation—and you build that brick by brick, through your choices.
That’s the crux of it. Choices are the currency of our agency— the units of decision-making power. Like an axe in your hand or the money in your pocket, each choice can be used for whatever purpose you wish.
In the consumer world, you vote for the success of a brand with your money. In life, you vote for the success of your future with your choices.
We make thousands of choices every day. You and I are equally rich in that sense—we have the same currency to spend, from the moment our eyes open to when they close. Every action is a choice. Doing nothing is a choice. How you respond is a choice. Not responding is a choice. How much of what kind of energy you invest into a thought, an action, a feeling, a need, or a person is a choice.
The power sits entirely in your hands. It’s always been in your hands, but like me, you may have formerly chosen to hand your power over to unhealthy behaviour.
You are the commander of your choices. Make them all serve you. They exist to serve you, but only if you direct them with intention and authority.
My own choices led me into addiction, and it is my choices that brought me to sobriety. I own all of them. I can’t not. I have to. Only by owning them can I steer the course of my future.
This is the power of choice.
Choices, repeated often enough, can rewrite your identity.
I am the sum of all my choices. I am whatever I repeat.
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So good Adam. Keep going. I particularly liked "sobriety doesn't open the gates of heaven to let you in. Rather, it opens the gates of hell to let you out." That's gold, and so true. Well done, man.
It's empowering to take responsibility for my future and so depressing to take full responsibility for my past. The truth is the key to my prison though so I need to keep hearing it. Very inspiring, thank you for this.